I used to hear this saying and thought is was a really neat rhyme. Then I started to understand it, all the while, being entirely too tough on myself. So wait, I’m thinking, if I resist pain, poverty and cellulite, then I’ll simply get more of it? Wow, that really sucks, right? But then, through years of obsessive study and relentless application, I began to see the deeper meaning, which coincidentally, actually has two parts.
First of all, wherever we put our attention, we apply power. Our thought forms are energetic and like it or not, we create most of our own problems, dramas and set-backs. Where attention goes energy flows. So in that sense, yes, if we’re resisting something then chances are we’re giving it our attention, right? If I resist a stubborn client, for example, I am putting my attention on the parts of the client that are driving me batty, thus increasing that behavior because of my energy toward it (PS if you are one of my clients, I am not talking about you. You are a perfect little lamb that I love so very much). In this first sense it is so true that we must learn to focus on what we want instead of what we do not like or want. I get that. I really do. The more tricky part in my opinion is in the releasing of resistance. My Jewish angel-in-training, Morty (sorry, you’ll have to read the book), says something about going with the flow.
I’d been hearing we should go with the flow for a long time, but I’ve always had an issue with it. I mean, do I need a raft or would a fishing boat be better? And say for example, something terrible happens, does that mean I should just go with it and not stand up for myself or press charges, or write a complaint letter or whatever else might seem appropriate? However, Going with the flow isn’t about giving in, cowing down or being a quitter. It’s not about surrendering to things you do not want to happen or giving up because you hit a bump in the road. There are indeed times when we must take a stand, make some noise or push ahead harder and stronger. I think this is where the Serenity Prayer comes in: “Give me the courage to change the things I can….” But what about for the things that seem unchangeable, what then?
I believe the opposite of resistance is trust. you can call it faith if you want to. Heck, you could call it Morty like I do, but inevitably, and in order to keep your sanity, you will indeed need to call upon it. Let’s look at an example, shall we? Say for instance you don’t get a job you really had your heart set on. Let’s say you did all the visualizing, praying and calling in favors known to man. Still, you didn’t get the job. You cry, complain and swear the hiring committee was on crack cocaine. It’s what you do next that makes the difference, at least in my opinion.
Look, if you do everything you can to have, do or be something, and it just doesn’t happen for you, you’ve got to do some real soul searching. First and foremost you have to ask yourself if you’re 100 percent certain you really did put forth the effort. You could tell me all the physical actions you took toward your goal or intention, but it’s the mental ones that matter most. I won’t go into the whole slew of things because then you might never buy my books. Naughty you! Okay, Mommy will be serious and helpful now. Some of the things that may have held you back could include buried resentment, self doubt or fear. But let’s put all that aside for next week’s post, shall we? And let’s assume you’ve got none of those issues that could have stood in the way. So now what?
Now is when the trust part comes into play. Now is when you have to stop and look at the situation. Okay,so you didn’t get the job, you did everything right and for all intents and purposes that damn job should have been yours. This is when you get to choose. Will you resist the reality that you didn’t get the job, or will you trust that there may be a good reason? Will you walk around bitter at everyone you know who has a great job and feel sorry for yourself that you just can’t catch a break, or will you entertain the possibility that there’s something different or better in store for you? Is it at all possible that the Universe has different plans that will end up serving you better in the long run?
We don’t always get what we want, but we just might find, we get what we need. Trust me, I’m the one that taught Mick Jagger that line. What we resist is often related to our desires not being met. Accepting what is, trusting that there is a reason, is what serenity is all about. Focus on what you want, do what you can, and give the Universe a little leeway in how it decides to make your dreams come true. You’re welcome.
If you haven’t read The Law of Distraction & Art of Intention, you can pick up a signed copy here. Or, stop by amazon.com. Heck you can even buy the workbook to be double sure you’re focused on your desires instead of your demons. Stay Inspired.